AI anal beads and $1m adult site offer saw chess cheating scandal turn to chaos

The world of chess is currently suffocating beneath a scandal concerning Artificially Intelligent (AI) anal beads, one million dollar naked webcam performance requests… and Jose Mourinho memes.

Within the space of a few weeks, the normally quiet, reserved, and dignified chess universe has descended into a jaw dropping drama the writers of the Queens’ Gambit could only fathom after a stiff strike to the head with a stone chess board.

No.1 Chess Grandmaster Magnus Carlsen, a rather eccentric individual at the best of times, was enjoying a 53 match unbeaten streak before he came up against 19-year-old American Hans Niemann at the Sinquefield Cup in St.Louis.

Despite being the lowest ranked player in the whole tournament, Niemann overcame the Norwegian in a performance so remarkable, a significant contingent within the chess community believe anal beads, controlled by AI, may have vibrated Niemann to an unlikely victory – and that is just the start. Daily Star Sport investigates how the sport of chess has found itself in the vibrating predicament it currently finds itself in.

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Before the world of chess lost its mind, and perhaps all of its innocence, Carlsen was enjoying a 53-match unbeaten streak. As the top ranked player in the world, according to the International Chess Federation, Carlsen was expecting to breeze his way past the promising, but very inexperienced teenager.

Unfortunately, Niemann knocked Carlsen’s ego before his own King, overcoming the Norwegian in what was considered a potentially historic moment in the sport. However, further shockwaves were caused when Carlsen resigned from the rest of the tournament for the first time in his career.

“I’ve withdrawn from the tournament,” Carlsen said in a tweet soon after his loss. “I’ve always enjoyed playing in the STL Chess Club, and hope to be back in the future.” However, further layers to the tale were added when Carlsen accompanied his tweet with the video of Mourinho’s iconic ‘I prefer not to speak’ rant during his second stint as Chelsea manager.

Carlsen’s apparent insinuation of foul play on Niemann’s part sent the chess rumour mill spinning. There was no evidence put forward on the Norwegian’s part, nor were there any potential explanations of how Niemann could have cheated his way to the shock victory.

Nevertheless, Japanese chess grandmaster Hikaru Nakamura made several comments on his Twitch account citing Niemann’s history of cheating in previous chess tournaments when he was between the ages of 12 and 16. The American has previously opened up about his previous misdemeanours in the sport but claims he has reformed and come full circle since he left his teenage years.

Have you suddenly become even more interested in Chess? Let us know in the comments section below

But while his history may be as chequered as the very boards he uses, even he would have been stunned by the bizarre tales emerging from the chess rumour mill. While the chess community certainly has its fair share of, shall we say, imaginative individuals, even the most ardent lovers of the sport would have been knocked by the latest rumour to encompass this utterly bizarre but yet captivating feud.

A Reddit post, which has since been deleted, claimed Niemann may have been using AI anal beads during his victory over Carlsen. The crux of the theory is the vibrations caused by the anal beads would have, one way or another, guided Niemann and told him where to move and how to counter his Norwegian's opponents moves.

Logic would suggest morse code may have been used to help guide Niemann’s moves, but all logic has surely gone out of the window when the possibility of using anal beads against the finest chess mind on planet earth is debated with a straight face.

Other more reserved, but still nevertheless out-there, theories have also claimed Niemann may have used a Raspberry Pi Zero vibration device in his shoes to connect to digital chess engines that are often used by novice players with a thirst for gamesmanship. Predictably, Niemann has grown rather irritated by these rumours. “If they want me to strip fully naked, I will do it,” Niemann said colourfully, in response to the allegations.

“I don't care. Because I know I am clean. You want me to play in a closed box with zero electronic transmission? I don't care. I'm here to win, and that is my goal regardless. It must be embarrassing for the world champion to lose to me. I feel bad for him!”

This saga has become somewhat of a social media bandwagon, not just in the sporting community, but in areas outside of chess and sport as a whole. Even Elon Musk, the wealthiest person on the planet, chimed in with his own little contribution on Twitter.

“‘Talent hits a target no one else can hit, genius hits a target no one can see (cause it’s in ur butt)’ Schopenhauer,” Musk posted in a now deleted Tweet. Shortly after the Tesla Titan chimed in with his own comedic input, adult site Stripchat put together their own X-rated pitch to the 19-year-old American. In exchange for $1m (£878,000), Stripchat offered Niemann the opportunity to clear his name in exactly the same way he proposed – naked.

After congratulating his victory and extending their own sympathies about the accusations, Stripchat, which has over 400million views per month, offered him the opportunity to play one of his next matches naked.

“I know you even offered to strip completely naked to prove to people you didn’t cheat,” the Stripchat letter read. “Well….being that Stripchat is an adult entertainment webcam platform that receives 400million views on average each month, I wanted to extend you an offer to do just that.”

The letter continued. “Prove the haters wrong once and for all. Strip naked and play a game of chess live on Stripchat in return for up to $1million.” As sporting requests go, this is surely one of the more audacious ones.

However, Carlsen’s resentment towards the young American overflowed into the Julius Baer Generation Cup on Monday. After only two moves, Carlsen switched off his Teams camera and resigned from the contest.

“Magnus Carlsen just resigned. Got up and left,” Chess24 commentator and chess grandmaster Tania Sachdev said after the Norwegian’s Piers Morgan like exit. “Switched off his camera, and that’s all we know right now. We’re going to try to get an update on this.”

And the update appeared to be that Carlsen will not depart the tournament – he just will not face Niemann. Both players returned for their following matches after, yet the conversation still gravitated to their explosive feud.

“This is unprecedented. I just, I can’t believe it,” Sachdev added. “Did that just happen? Magnus [is] just refusing to play against Hans. He will play the tournament, but he is saying ‘I will not play the game against him’. That’s making a very big statement.”

Whether you are a Chess aficionado or not, this bubbling, rumbling dispute may only be in its infancy. Let's just hope any further escalation does not include any more sex toys.

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